How Do I Know If I'm Trans? (2024)

It's okay if you're unsure: discovering your gender identity is a confusing and tricky process for many of us. Only you will know how to identify and express yourself correctly.

How Do I Know If I'm Trans? (1)

"What does it mean to be trans?"

Transgender people have a sense that the sex they were assigned when they were born does not match their gender identity: the gender that they feel inside.

Trans is an umbrella term that includes a broad spectrum of many different gender identities.

There is no one definition of what it means to be trans. Gender is not binary, and our experiences of gender are all subjective and personal. That means knowing if we're trans or not is something only we can answer for ourselves, which can be really tricky and confusing and challenging. If you're questioning things, you're not alone.

"Am I normal?"

Being trans is normal, and nothing new. A 2022 survey found that "5% of young adults in the U.S. say their gender is different from their sex assigned at birth." For as long as mankind has been around, there have been people who experienced trans or gender-expansive identities across all cultures and regions. Trans and non-binary people have always been here.

Try asking yourself:

  • How do I feel when someone uses gendered pronouns or termsto refer to me, like “sir” or “ma’am”?
  • How do I feel when I wear gendered clothing, like suits or dresses?
  • How do I feel about physical characteristics of my assigned sex, such as facial hair or breast tissue?
  • Do I feel like my gender assigned at birth just doesn’t fit me?
  • What gender do I wish others saw me as?
  • When I imagine myself in the future, what do I see?

It’s okay if you don’t have clear answers for these questions yet. The process of discovering our gender takes time, and our identities can shift and evolve over time, too.


"Do I need gender dysphoria?"

You may have heard the term gender dysphoria, or "a sense that your gender identity conflicts with the sex you were assigned at birth." It is a term that focuses on the emotional distress that a mismatch between one's assigned sex and gender identity causes.

Many trans and non-binary people experience dysphoria. The level of distress you feel can vary from just a little to severe, and it may show up across many areas of daily life. It can also come and go at different points of your life.

With so much media and news focused on trans hardship, you might think you need to feel suffering in order to be trans, but that is untrue. Not all trans people experience gender dysphoria.

On the other hand, you might experience what trans writer Adrian Silbernagel explains is gender euphoria, or the “feeling of satisfaction, joy, or intoxication, with the congruence, or rightness, between one’s internal and external reality (sex and gender, internal experience and outside expression, etc.).” Many trans folks across the spectrum feel joy when wearing clothing or accessories that align with their sense of self, or when people in their life perceive them authentically.

"What if I don't present very masculine/very feminine now, and don't want to in the future?"

There are no qualifications or checklists to being trans or non-binary. You can wear a pink dress and identify as a trans man. You don't need to wear makeup to be a trans woman.

In his article on first realizing he identified as a trans man, writer Kasey Leblanc shares that he spent much of his adolescence and early adulthood dressing in conventionally "feminine" clothing: "The clothes you’ve worn in the past and the clothes you’ll wear in the future do not dictate your gender, nor do they determine your 'transness.' So if you’re comfortable in jeans and a hoodie, or if you want to rock some nail polish, remember this: Clothes don’t make the person. You do."

"What if I didn't feel this way as a child?"

While many trans people have a sense of their gender identity at a young age, people of all ages can discover and identify themselves as trans. You are still valid regardless of what age you know or if/when you decide to come out.

Writer Samantha Riedel, who shares her the questions she first asked herself when identifying as non-binary transfeminine, explains that as a child, she repressed expressions of her femininity to avoid possible consequences from family: "I even joined Boy Scouts, one of the most stereotypically masculine youth clubs on the planet. That doesn't mean I'm not trans; it just means I subconsciously understood, even as a five-year-old, that being myself was to invite hostility and ridicule. Whether you knew who you wanted to be or not, and regardless if anyone saw any clues, your childhood doesn't have to determine who you are as an adult."

"Do I need to transition?"

Remember that there are many parts to gender, such as:

  • Gender expression. This includes how you dress, how you use your voice and language, and your behavior.
  • Gender presentation: This is how the world sees and understands you.
  • Gender identity: This is how you see yourself.

Transitioning is a process of changing how you show up as your authentic self. Many trans people choose to transition in some way, so that their gender expression and presentation align with their identity. Transition can look like:

  • Social changes. This includes coming out as trans, using a new name or pronouns, changing how you dress or style your hair. Some trans masculine and non-binary folks wear chest binders; some trans feminine and non-binary folks wear gaffs and shapewear.
  • Legal changes. This includes updating documents like your driver's license/photo ID, passport, or birth certificate.
  • Medical interventions. This includes taking puberty blockers or gender-affirming hormone replacement therapy, getting permanent hair removal services, or receiving gender-affirming surgery.

Not all trans people transition. For those that do, not all trans people transition in the same way. Legal and medical transitioning can be expensive, unsafe, or impossible to obtain depending on where you live. Your transition might be gradual, or happen very quickly. You might want some medical interventions (like hormones) but not all (like surgery.) You might present your gender authentically in some settings (like around friends) but not everywhere (like at work or school.)

No matter what your journey looks like, if you discover and identify yourself as trans, you are "trans enough" just as you are.


Ways to explore your gender identity

  • Keep a journal and write about how you feel.
  • Talk with trusted friends or family members.
  • Talk with a competent, affirming counselor, or therapist. By this we mean someone who has worked with trans clients in the past and is knowledgeable about our community. A local LGBTQ+ center or school's GSA facilitator may be able to offer recommendations. (CenterLink's LGBTQ+ Directory is a great tool to find nearby centers. For online therapy, you might want to learn more about TalkSpace's licensed LGBTQ+ affirming therapists, many of whom are queer people themselves.)
  • Talk with folks in the community. You can get to know others who may have gone through what you're going through now in a welcoming environment, whether that's in-person at a support group or online in a forum or other safe space. (Gender Spectrum hosts free online groups for pre-teens, teens, parents, caregivers, and other family members and adults. Many of these groups are facilitated by trained volunteers.)
  • Read books or articles about trans people's experiences, or watch vlogs or video diaries online. There's no one right way to be trans: everyone's journey looks different. By hearing many stories, you can better understand your own sense of self and journey.
  • If you wish, you can experiment with going by a different name or pronouns. This can be privately in your journal, online in forums/on social media, or in person with trusted people in your life, depending on your safety and comfort.

Your gender is not the only thing that defines you, and only you can define what your gender is. In the end, your trans status is just one part of who you are—a beautiful, complex, unique individual.

You may also want to read our guide,"How Do I Know If I'm Non-Binary?" which answers several FAQs and introduces a number of common non-binary identities.

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Tags: , Trans Living

How Do I Know If I'm Trans? (2)

Written by Point of Pride

Point of Pride provides financial aid and direct support to trans folks in need of health and wellness care.

How Do I Know If I'm Trans? (2024)

FAQs

How Do I Know If I'm Trans? ›

As long as you're taking steps to make yourself feel comfortable in your own skin, you're doing it right – and you are certainly “trans enough”. You are the expert about yourself and your gender, and no one else gets to decide what being trans looks like for you. There's no right or wrong way to be trans.

How do I figure out if I'm trans? ›

You're transgender (or trans) if your gender identity is different from the sex the doctor assigned you at birth. For example, you may be transgender if you were assigned male at birth and know you're a woman.

How do I know if I'm ready to transition? ›

You might want to wear clothes, participate in activities, and be thought of by other people as a different gender than the one you were assigned at birth. These feelings indicate that you might be ready to start transitioning.

How to be sure that you're trans? ›

There is no right way for a person to figure out that they are trans. You are the expert on yourself. You can explore your gender identity and decide what is right for you. Being transgender or cisgender is about how you feel about your gender identity.

Am I trans if I have dysphoria? ›

Gender dysphoria is the medical diagnosis for someone who experiences this distress. Not all transgender people have gender dysphoria. On its own, being transgender is not considered a medical condition.

Am I trans enough to be trans? ›

As long as you're taking steps to make yourself feel comfortable in your own skin, you're doing it right – and you are certainly “trans enough”. You are the expert about yourself and your gender, and no one else gets to decide what being trans looks like for you. There's no right or wrong way to be trans.

What does being trans feel like? ›

You may feel extremely uncomfortable with the gender-specific parts of your body. For example, you may have breasts and prefer not to have them. Or, you might not feel uncomfortable with your gender- specific body parts and, at the same time, feel a deep need to have other body parts.

What is the best age to transition? ›

Cross-Sex Hormones

The Endocrine Society recommends that kids start taking these hormones around age 16, but doctors will start them as early as 13 or 14. Most people who start these hormones stay on them for life, and doctors don't know much about how they affect people over the long term.

What does a good transition look like? ›

The key to producing good transitions is highlighting connections between corresponding paragraphs. By referencing in one paragraph the relevant material from previous paragraphs, writers can develop important points for their readers. It is a good idea to continue one paragraph where another leaves off.

How many years does it take to transition FTM? ›

Take your time, transitioning can take a long time. On average it takes 2-3 years. Talk to people in your trans support group if you want help with your appearance.

What are signs of trans? ›

Symptoms
  • A difference between gender identity and genitals or secondary sex characteristics, such as breast size, voice and facial hair. ...
  • A strong desire to be rid of these genitals or secondary sex characteristics, or a desire to prevent the development of secondary sex characteristics.
May 14, 2024

How to come out as a trans? ›

There is no right way to come out

There is no one way to come out. If you choose to come out as transgender, make sure it's to people you trust and that you have a support system in place. It's important to feel as confident as possible that coming out won't risk your safety, health, or living situation.

Am I trans OCD? ›

TOCD Obsessions

Questioning one's gender identity, even in the absence of other signs. For example, asking oneself, “What if I'm trans?” or “How do I know if I am actually the gender I think I am?” Excessive worry about being trans based on a belief that would mean seeking surgery to change their sexual anatomy.

What percentage of trans people get surgery? ›

How common is gender reassignment surgery? Gender reassignment (confirmation) surgery is more common in transgender men (42 to 54%) than transgender women (28%).

How rare is true gender dysphoria? ›

According to DSM-5-TR, the prevalence of gender dysphoria is 0.005–0.014% for adult natal males and 0.002-0.003% for adult natal females. In Europe, 1 per 30,000 adult males and 1 per 100,000 adult females seek sexual reassignment surgery (SRS).

Can childhood trauma cause gender dysphoria? ›

Indeed, in developmentally traumatized kids, puberty can reactivate great emotional distress, because our toddler-era right brain neural networks reconsolidate in our teen years. Perhaps this phenomenon contributes to Rapid Onset Gender Dysphoria.

How do I know if I'm trans or genderfluid? ›

See how you feel about your assigned sex at birth.

If you don't feel comfortable identifying with the gender you were assigned at birth, or your gender and sex don't correspond to each other, it's very likely you identify under the trans umbrella, whether or not you're gender-fluid.

What to do when you realize you're trans? ›

You can find support in a lot of places, including:
  1. other transgender or nonbinary people who can share their experience of coming out or transitioning;
  2. transgender support groups at your local LGBTQ+ community center, school LGBTQ+ group, or PFLAG local chapter; and.
  3. supportive cisgender people.

What are signs of gender dysphoria? ›

A strong desire for the primary and/or secondary sex characteristics of the other gender. A strong desire to be of the other gender (or some alternative gender different from one's assigned gender) A strong desire to be treated as the other gender (or some alternative gender different from one's assigned gender)

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